JAY-Z AND BEYONCE WORRY ABOUT KANYE WEST

toastranger and itsthepoppins are jay and bey. this blog is pure imagination; we don't own any images. enjoy.
"Jay, when I said I wanted a break from Kanye, I really didn’t think there was anyway you could make it worse.”
"Bey, I brought Kelly."
"Boy, I know. Now I have to fake smile all night. I can just feel her sucking my shine. One thing I know, things that begin with ‘K’ are bad for me. Killer Bees, Kufis, Kanye, and Kelly Soul Sucking Rowland.”

"Jay, when I said I wanted a break from Kanye, I really didn’t think there was anyway you could make it worse.”

"Bey, I brought Kelly."

"Boy, I know. Now I have to fake smile all night. I can just feel her sucking my shine. One thing I know, things that begin with ‘K’ are bad for me. Killer Bees, Kufis, Kanye, and Kelly Soul Sucking Rowland.”

“Jaaaay, Jaaaaaaay! I found him, he is over here scaring these folks in VIP. He keeps screaming, ‘ello, ello, ello, hello white america, assassinate my character.’ To every single one of ‘em Jay. He grabbed GWYNETH PALTROW, and screamed it in her ear. She is not happy, Jay. I’m trying to get Baby Blue to do a duet with Baby Apple, and I’ll be damned if I see another baby get the spot. You better call this boy back on stage. My child will be a singing sensation across Bey’s Great Nation, or my name ain’t Beyonce Run The World Knowles-Carter. Amen!”

Jaaaay, Jaaaaaaay! I found him, he is over here scaring these folks in VIP. He keeps screaming, ‘ello, ello, ello, hello white america, assassinate my character.’ To every single one of ‘em Jay. He grabbed GWYNETH PALTROW, and screamed it in her ear. She is not happy, Jay. I’m trying to get Baby Blue to do a duet with Baby Apple, and I’ll be damned if I see another baby get the spot. You better call this boy back on stage. My child will be a singing sensation across Bey’s Great Nation, or my name ain’t Beyonce Run The World Knowles-Carter. Amen!”

"I cannot believe we saved Ye’s seat for him until the very last minute and he never showed… He’s been spending so much time with Kim lately… Bey, I’m very frightened. What if he likes that troll-faced fuck Scott Disick better than me? What if?” 
"Don’t be silly. Kanye loves you! That will never happen, Jay."
"Maybe it already has… Maybe… it… already… has." 

"I cannot believe we saved Ye’s seat for him until the very last minute and he never showed… He’s been spending so much time with Kim lately… Bey, I’m very frightened. What if he likes that troll-faced fuck Scott Disick better than me? What if?” 

"Don’t be silly. Kanye loves you! That will never happen, Jay."

"Maybe it already has… Maybe… it… already… has." 

"I’ve been sitting here since I left the BET awards. I keep watching the part where Jay interrupted my acceptance speech. After hours and hours of playback footage, I realized why I love this man. He waited three years to teach me my lesson. THREE WHOLE YEARS, Y’ALL. Now that’s some grown-up parenting shit if I’ve ever seen it. Like he went all Heathcliff Huxtable on my ass. I was definitely Vanessa Huxtable in this situation; I thought I got away with it, but BAM, Jay “Heathcliff” Z came in and shut my shit down. Thanks Jay, I needed some of that Huxtable Tough Love.”

"I’ve been sitting here since I left the BET awards. I keep watching the part where Jay interrupted my acceptance speech. After hours and hours of playback footage, I realized why I love this man. He waited three years to teach me my lesson. THREE WHOLE YEARS, Y’ALL. Now that’s some grown-up parenting shit if I’ve ever seen it. Like he went all Heathcliff Huxtable on my ass. I was definitely Vanessa Huxtable in this situation; I thought I got away with it, but BAM, Jay “Heathcliff” Z came in and shut my shit down. Thanks Jay, I needed some of that Huxtable Tough Love.”

"Kanye just texted me… He wants me to tell you that he says he apologizes. Again. From the bottom of his heart. And he wants to know if you got the bouquet and the ‘I’m Sorry’ teddy bear."
"Fine. Whatever. You can tell him I accept his lame-ass apology. But give him fair warning that if he ever, ever again suggests I reunite with Destiny’s Child… I will end him. End him.” 

"Kanye just texted me… He wants me to tell you that he says he apologizes. Again. From the bottom of his heart. And he wants to know if you got the bouquet and the ‘I’m Sorry’ teddy bear."

"Fine. Whatever. You can tell him I accept his lame-ass apology. But give him fair warning that if he ever, ever again suggests I reunite with Destiny’s Child… I will end him. End him.” 

"Kanye and Bey got into it over who had the best vocals in the game. Bey said she did, and that Ye was nothing more than a bootleg T-pain. Ye, of course, then said Bey was 2 bags of chips away from obesity and disability checks. Now he made me come over and remove any and all murals that he has in his home of Bey. I’ve been here for 8 hours, I still have to remove the 8 foot statue of Bey holding Ye like the Madonna. Imma put it on craigslist.”

"Kanye and Bey got into it over who had the best vocals in the game. Bey said she did, and that Ye was nothing more than a bootleg T-pain. Ye, of course, then said Bey was 2 bags of chips away from obesity and disability checks. Now he made me come over and remove any and all murals that he has in his home of Bey. I’ve been here for 8 hours, I still have to remove the 8 foot statue of Bey holding Ye like the Madonna. Imma put it on craigslist.”

"I… I love you, Kanye."
"Aw, I love you too, K-Squared! And by ‘love,’ of course, I mean ‘am both fearful of and compelled by your butt.’ Seriously, is it, like, a hologram? Is it like the same technology they used to bring Tupac back at Coachella? I gotta know, Kim, I just… I gotta know already, it’s keeping me up at night… Is it being constantly stung by tiny invisible bees to which you are highly allergic? …Did you anger an evil wizard?" 

"I… I love you, Kanye."

"Aw, I love you too, K-Squared! And by ‘love,’ of course, I mean ‘am both fearful of and compelled by your butt.’ Seriously, is it, like, a hologram? Is it like the same technology they used to bring Tupac back at Coachella? I gotta know, Kim, I just… I gotta know already, it’s keeping me up at night… Is it being constantly stung by tiny invisible bees to which you are highly allergic? …Did you anger an evil wizard?" 

"No…there is no way. She’s not that damn crazy. Did she really just, oh laaawd. Jay, Kim K. hired a body double and had it attend one of the Watch The Throne shows. She could have at least got someone with a better jheri curl. And that pasty ass forehead? No one can believe that’s me, right? Omg, omg, omg, omg. Someone help, she is trying to steal me, she is trying to steal my presence. SOMEONE HELP. Jay, call my publicist. Call a Vet, this beast needs to be put to sleep. She is rabid. Kanye is not safe.”

"Kanye is making me literally watch the throne. He’s terrified that someone’s gonna steal it. How would you even lift it? How would you lift this throne off the ground? God. He thinks he’s a fuckin’ Lannister or some shit. I don’t even watch that show. I don’t understand my own reference. I don’t even know what’s going on. I need to go feed my infant child."

"Kanye is making me literally watch the throne. He’s terrified that someone’s gonna steal it. How would you even lift it? How would you lift this throne off the ground? God. He thinks he’s a fuckin’ Lannister or some shit. I don’t even watch that show. I don’t understand my own reference. I don’t even know what’s going on. I need to go feed my infant child."

"Jay…Jaaay! Why is Kanye muttering and smiling to himself?”
"I don’t know Bey, just let the boy have fun."
"See, this is why people think we’re in the damn Illuminati.”

"Jay…Jaaay! Why is Kanye muttering and smiling to himself?”

"I don’t know Bey, just let the boy have fun."

"See, this is why people think we’re in the damn Illuminati.”